The little girl in the soccer goal staring at the sky. The little boy on the ball field looking at butterflies instead of fly balls. The child in martial arts or dance class who’d rather spin in circles than pay attention to the teacher.

As adults, we’ve all seen it or heard about it from our friends. What does it mean about whether your child is ready to participate in an organized activity?

Pete Stavinoha, Ph.D., a child psychologist at Children’s Medical Center, says children’s interests stem from their exposure to various activities. “Parents should have their child try things out but not commit long-term, either time-wise or financially.”

Stavinoha says parents should think about activities their child is naturally exposed to. If your child loves dance time at daycare, or is always running full speed around the playground, those might be activities they would enjoy in an organized way.

Try things out first
Once you find an age- and skill-level appropriate activity, it’s worth asking activity leaders if your child can try a class or two on a trial basis. If your child spends the class screaming, avoiding or withdrawing, you won’t have made a large financial or time commitment, Stavinoha said.

He added, however, that what a child may get out of an organized activity might not be what parents expect. “A young child who plays soccer may or may not learn strategies for dribbling, shooting, heading the ball or scoring, but he or she might benefit from the activity because they are having a good time running around in the sunshine, getting fit and being with friends.”

Before you book your child for an organized sport or other activity, Stavinoha advises parents to establish appropriate goals. Once your child tries out the activity, reassess whether their goals are being met.

“Parents should ask themselves ‘Why do we want our child to do this?’” he says. “Is it for competition or is it just for them to have fun? You can keep your child active but not necessarily as part of an organized sport or class.”

Last reviewed: August 2008